What would you say to this?

You hold all my secrets.

Quick to fire, slow to aim.

Stupidity knows no limits.

"Therese, blogspot isn't twitter!"

Smart girl.

Don't act like you didn't know, this is what you're signing up for.

Bad English.

It makes my eyes hurt.

Boring.

Aww cmon. We've only just begun...

If I wrote you an open invitation...

Did I miss something major, or did 2010 just sneak up on me very quietly? Maybe it's cause I've decided to turn in early tonight, and not party out like the rest of the world.

I met Soffie at the esplanade today to go see Shi Hua's flash mob. It was pretty cool that a bunch of people who didnt know each other got together via a facebook group to celebrate MJ's music. Anyway, Sherlock Holmes was as good as Avatar :) I brought him to Canelé for earl grey ice cream after that (I've been there thrice this week alone. Can you imagine.. Once I start work?) and we had an elightening conversation about.. Stuff. Okay blah blah blah. I hate chronologicalizing events of my life.

The important part of today was when I had some alone time on the bus home. I contemplated "paths not taken" and the boldness I maybe possess. Question is, how far will you run with me?

MEOW

I see you.

Frankly I don't see the point of being shy about it. Haters gonna hate! So flaunt yo ugly mouth if you've got one. Gotta love their reactions.

Avatar lived up to expectations! Long long movie that was really really cool. And I finally did what soffie told me to do. Even though it was kinda cheating, cause I texted, I still got the message across and that's the important part. Isn't it curious how I have the self control of a peanut?

Oh, you want to point me to a mirror?

How long will I swim?

Today I'll finally catch avatar. I hope. Anyway aren't I up early? :) I slept early last night, majorly proud of myself.


Okay just my two cents worth.

I hope both of them confront each other. And have this huge ass mega bitch fight, complete with hair-ripping and gutteral screaming. Yknow like just thrash everything out there and then. Instead of having this cyberwar where they pretend to be so above each other on their respective blogs. Well okay first there is shila who has tried to pull this kinda stunt with me before. You'd think by now she'd realize all this effort over a guy, doesn't exactly magnify her own self-worth. Then there's atiqah, did I spell that right? I think she has more of an excuse. It's like her first time. But she's not your average act-innocent teen either. Rather easy to hate so I guess I see where shila is coming from. Mmph anyway like I said. They should just fight it out. Like physically. Then we can end this argument about who's fatter, cause obviously the fatter one will win, if only by sheer massiveness. Oh but atiqah should remove all her piercings beforehand, it could get very messy if they get accidentally torn off. As a passive, haha albeit amused, onlooker, I seriously think that's the best course of action. Ahh this brings back memories. Remember the whole cheena penyet saga? Good times.

What happened to the part where we fall in love?

Today I made my way down to EY to sign the contract. Used the opportunity to mingle smore with the other temp staff. I'm getting really psyched for this attachment :) After that I met Kev to do a little catching up. Weirdly, I was slightly more subdued than usual, and we didn't launch into our normal soul-searching conversation. But he's doing good. I'm so excited for all the IB people! Results in 8 days! Wow i'd be flippin if I were one of them. Shit scary stuff.

I can't make my own decisions, or make any with precision. Well maybe you should tie me up, so I don't go where you don't want me.

What happened to the part where we fall in love?

It's just my humble opinion, but maybe you should stop walking into this death trap right here.

I'm in so much trouble.

If I were a month, I’d be November
If I were a day of the week, I’d be Thursday
If I were a time of day, I’d be 6.38pm
If I were a planet, I’d be Neptune
If I were a sea animal, I’d be a Jellyfish
If I were a direction, I’d be Up
If I were a piece of furniture, I’d be a Bed
If I were a liquid, I’d be Water
If I were a gemstone, I’d be Jade
If I were a tree, I’d be a Willow
If I were a tool, I’d be a Knife
If I were a kind of weather, I’d be Sunny and Windy
If I were a musical instrument, I’d be a Bass Guitar
If I were a color, I’d be Yellow
If I were an emotion, I’d be Passion
If I were a fruit, I’d be a Grapefruit
If I were a sound, I’d be a Baby's Laughter
If I were an element, I’d be Fire
If I were a car, I’d be a Jeep
If I were a food, I’d be Ice Cream
If I were a place, I’d be Santorini, Greece
If I were a material, I’d be Cotton
If I were a taste, I’d be Spicy
If I were a scent, I’d be Chocolate
If I were an object, I’d be a Journal
If I were a body part, I’d be the Collarbone
If I were a facial expression, I’d be Bemused
If I were a song, I'd be Remix to Ignition by R Kelly
If I were a pair of shoes, I’d be 5-inch Heels

Sigh.

Okay so mum calls me from office.

Mum: You said you're gonna give away some of your books right
Me: Yah
Mum: What level are those books?
Me: JC..
Mum: You should hold on to those til results come out right
Me: You want me to repeat JC?
Mum: I don't want you to repeat, I'm just saying you might need them again..
Me: (thinking of all my notes and files I've already thrown out into the rubbish bin. like permanently.) Well if I had to repeat, I'd go to poly and not do JC again.. Right?
Mum: Well whichever la just hold on to them first

silence

Me: Okay okay yeah I'll keep them.

WHY DO I FEEL LIKE CRYING NOW.

Unacceptable Behavior

I had such a workout today. Of all trainings I had to go back for the one with intervals. I almost hurled my non-existent breakfast up. That's how unfit I am. Oh well. I shall just have to do something about it.

My upperlip sports a tiny bruise now, and God knows why.

The thing about being young and senseless.

Her: What would I do without you?
Him: You'll never have to find out.

It isn't that hard to understand why I'm not bothered about the missing piece. The putting together of the puzzle was the main point, not obtaing a perfect picture. I don't really care if we ever find it. The tiny gap does not mar the delightfulness of our work.

Yet. What I would give, to be able to let go the little inadequacies. Is perfection too much to ask of you? What I would give, to be able to simply enjoy the ride for the ride. Let go of my standards once in awhile, and appreciate smaller things.



But you are so inadequate. So below my standards. So much smaller than the greatness I had in mind.

Talk back trembling lips.

Today has been ridiculously short. Maybe it's cause I got out of bed at 2. Today has also been ridiculously fun. Cause all I did was stay home, finish the puzzle (which has one piece missing, a la Mrs Tan's one 4 years ago), and slack on the computer. Life is bright and shiny.

I'm resolving to go back for floorball training AT LEAST ONCE. I'm going to MAKE TIME. It doesn't matter that I'm crazy unfit right now. JUST GO, THERESE. Shuffle your appointments around and GO.

Speaking of unfit, insert sigh, today has also been a I'm-made-of-blubber day. Time to do something about it. Muscles degenerating at an unhealthy rate.

Smile :)

Cry me a river.

My bodyclock needs serious re-adjustment. I've been reaching home super late and sleeping at odd hours. Night eats into day, and the cycle repeats. Unhealthy. I won't survive when work starts.

Anyway I don't know how much I haven't updated, kinda lost track of the things I blog about. Let's see, last night was the BBQ at JT's place. My first foray into rockband. I loved the beatles' one :) It was nice to see all the seniors again and stuff, had a super long chat with soffie, whom I'm determined to help cause he deserves it. Before the BBQ I met august to exchange gifts and catch up. Well we did that for 5 hours, effectively. He was patient enough to walk with me all of serangoon to find JT's place. Okay it wasn't ALL of serangoon, but surely felt like almost all of it. I love his gift, I told you books and CDs are foolproof to me, it's playing in my living room right now as my family finishes up our 1000 piece puzzle.

Yes, that. We started at 12noon on christmas day and still haven't finished. I think it's a fun way to pass time. In fact, I'm gonna get out of bed and go help them now :) Good afternoon blogosphere!

Pushing my luck.

Everybody plays the game.

Audrey and Madelynn. My two closest friends from primary school. We had a sorta reunion get-together last night. And it only made me think, how wonderful it'd be if Maddie could stay here for longer. And we could do more stuff together. Something about their company, it feels right. Comforting, sort of. Haha I don't know it feels like a tiny voice in my head telling me that though I've changed so much and forgotten most of what happened all those years ago, a small part of me is still the same. When we're discussing something or just chatting, it's just jarring, startling almost, how different we are now. Hmm but we still fit, somehow. Childhood magic.

Anyway, we still had a rather tragic misadventure. Haha sigh. The things we can get away with just cause we're young.

"I wonder how long I can keep this up. We're so wrongly perfect. It's a shame I'm a dream."

Oh yes, please.

I'm gonna be at Audrey's tonight til tomorrow.

I think people who dot their I's with hearts, have some serious issues.

There's no chance of my dreams materializing.

Because I have the wildest most impossible ones. And I haven't seen you in what, a month? Just a single text message from you and my imagination goes into overdrive. Why??

John Lennon snorting coke.

Heheh.

Life's all shiny and happy, and exciting. Real exciting. No day is a typical day :) I'm just missing some people.

So, tonight's one of those nights y'know? Yeah, you know the feeling. Reminiscing about days when it wasn't so hard to keep in touch.

It would be like I never existed at all.

But everytime you look at her you think of me.

Santa can you hear me? I have been so good this year.

JB popped over on Saturday night to pass me a late birthday gift. That sweet boy got me Paramore's Brand New Eyes, so I've been tuned into it all day :)

I'm totally shagged. 2hrs of rest from this morning has been used up, my system's gonna shut down soon. But I just have to say that Shane is a complete cutie pie. Good lord the girls and I can't stop gushing about him. I wanna bring him home!!

Is this normal?

Blogging from jmin's house. Cause everybody has passed out and there's wireless.

Well, what can I say, my words seem to have a tendency of being chillingly prophetic. Not that makes it easier or helps me with The Next Step.

Ahh frustration.

"I'll wait."

Mean what you say, and say what you mean.

I've heard this one many times before, and I am getting pretty darn good at calling bluffs.

Jsyk.

for you

At the fore is the present, fuck the past, and commit to the future.

Get into the christmas spirit y'all!

Okay so they're my latest gem of a find from youtube. I might be slightly laggy with this one. But do checkout their version of Mrs Robinson and some of their originals (Y)

I fell in love straight away.

I love sleeping naked.

There's a place for us. Somewhere, there's a place for us.

What we do is innocent
Just for fun and
Nothing meant
If you don't like the company
Let's just do it you and me

I'm in a really good mood right now. And I mean really good. So good, I could-

I'd best not mention that here.

People write about it all the time. It's been discussed over and over. Girls gush about it, guys pretend it was nothing. That moment when you're still in someone else's arms and time stops. You get the feeling deep inside you that you've done something really good to deserve the kind of perfection you're partaking in. You finally got it right. He's the one. You're a perfect fit for each other.

But no one ever tells you the appropriate emotions for the instances when everything feels wrong. In that split second when your eyes are closed, your heart sighs inwardly. He's not the one. Now what?

Just sayin'.

Hey, I heard about your misfortune. I didn't smile, I didn't frown. No obvious emotion precipitated. Strange, how I've accomplished such disconnected-ness. (I've always seen myself as more of a passionate dispassionate, rather than the other way around.) So when you're flipping through your old phone book, feeling empty and sad, don't come to me for absolution. I have nothing. No comfort, no spite, no pity. We'll eventually cross paths one day for sure though, and I promise to be nice. Nice-ness comes easily to me, I have a special reserve of nice-ness set aside for people who don't mean anything to me. But I do have abit of advice. That one person who stuck with you even though you're jerk? She really loves you. She needs you. Continue tormenting each other. That's your best option. You guys are blind to each other's stupidity, and there'll never be a more perfect match. Now, and I say this will total certainty and not a hint of shame, love tastes much better when it's cruel. So since your heart is so crushed and trampled at this point, just take what she has to offer. How else will you go on, you needy, insecure creature? Then again, it's not real until you feel the pain. So DO you feel the pain. DID you feel the pain? You musn't have, I suppose. For your sake, I hope you're feeling it now. That would be your only consolation. Oh what about regret? Or... Bitterness? Do you feel any of those? Hey ring me up, tell me what it's like. It's not ironic that I've stayed alone and happy, while you chose not to be patient and got your pride destroyed. It's pure coincidence. Life's little way of handing out "Good Job" certs, y'know? I'm sorry if I've overwhelmed you with words. I know it's a lengthy paragraph. But wait! There's more. You know that I only ever play to win, and this is a good time to tell you that I'm truly ashamed I lost. I'll admit it now. I was the one with everything to lose, and I made some very bad calls. Hence, all things taken into consideration, yeah I am the ultimate loser. You won, and might I add, got off very lightly. There is a huge gap in my conscience now that will not be filled for a very long time, but that's my own fault. I'm just letting you know that I feel silly for all the mistakes I made. Oh well, since I can't reverse any of them, I shall just sit here in silent content knowing that I'm better armed for all my future battles. Between us, I still think you're the lesser person. And thus concludes this frivolous monologue.

Well champ, I only mean to wish you a merry christmas :)

Lucie Jones and Joe McElderry - Karaoke Duet - The One That I Want

CUTIE PIES! Hahahaa I died laughing.

"Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love"

Don't say victim, don't say loss. But repeated mistakes would be stupidity. So when? How do you know?

Interview with Ernst & Young on Friday morning. I spent the day crawling town to find boring clothes for it. Wish me luck :)

When it's earnest, sincere, honest & true.
That's when you know.

If I don't know what's good for me tonight,

Are cheap kicks alright?

We could be building something out of our despair.

something so beautiful can chill you to the bones

My Tuesday kicked ass :) The girls and I returned to TK to help out at netball camp. We relived our better times by lunching at videoworld (even if they've upgraded to some mega store now), buying the same 15cent snack and cup noodles, and laughing at familiar jokes only we understand. We fell back into our comforting rhythm, like the last 2 years did nothing if not make us appreciate each other more. Training itself was fun of course, gotta miss ms lee's shouting. Dinner and desert was another affair altogether, we were all tired from the day's activity but it was still awesome talking. It's just a precious thing, having friends who care about you.

On the ride home, JB and I discussed some issues, to no definite conclusion. I don't know where this will take us, honestly.

But still, my Tuesday kicked ass. Oh did I mention we're holidaying together in Jan? :D I'm crossing my fingers and hoping really hard that all of us manage to make it.

so tell me what's the deal? this time it's me who breaking all the rules. i'm sure you wish you could be, ever so transported, on a magic carpet.

Rule #2 The Double Tap

When in doubt, shoot the fucker again.

In a perfect world.

IN A PERFECT WORLD, a kiss wouldn't be a contract. Music would be played from the clouds. Sex would be a beautiful word. Green things would be greener. Memories would be bottled up as scents. Answers would be the only outcome of questions, and you and I?

You and I, we'd fly close to the sun.

With a confidence that killed.

Ohmama, Paramore's really coming next year? I STILL haven't bought their album!

Just another word I'll never learn to pronounce.

Today I met Daniel for lunch and movie cause he's finally 18 :) so in the spirit of grown-upped ness, we caught an m18 movie. Well, the ushers obviously didn't get it cause they didn't even check for identification. No fun one. Haha well i enjoyed catching up anyways.

Tomorrow, back at tk? :) well vyl hasn't replied me but I hope so!

You are a vile creature. I wonder what made you who you are today.

The price that I'll eventually have to pay.

So concludes a busy busy week. Next week is pretty packed too. I've been playing with the idea of signing up for driving lessons. Hmm, not sure if that'll kill the laid-back-yet-happening mode my life's currently in now. The beauty is in it's lack of structure I guess? Somewhat.

Oopsie daisy, I hurt you again.
Crushed your heart in the palm of my hand.
If you walk out baby, I'll understand.

I really hope things don't come to that, but I feel like we're spiralling towards it! Damned if I do, damned if I don't. It has nothing to do with common sense or logical thinking. Hell it doesn't even involve my heart. What am I doing?!?! Oh for the love of cheesecake.

All I'll do is hurt you.

I'm not so good with boundaries.

So we overstep them time and time again.


Zoukout was interesting. Haha I don't even understand how I can be awake now to post this.

Then decide if you want to, get to know me on the physical side.

I had an awesome time with the girls today even though it was only for a short while! I'm so poofed now.

Day & Night

Why are good things so fragile?

A very eventful night/morning. My body clock's all wonky now. Perhaps I'll put up some pictures :)

GET ME THIS FOR CHRISTMAS.

LOVE LIFE. LIVE.

OKAY everything is ready for prom. Except I haven't got a clutch, but NO MATTER! Everything else is ready :)

I'm not blogging much because I've been living \m/

I miss you very muchos.

Flashing lights that come from everywhere!

I'm back, happy, 2 kilos heavier :) Food was awwwwwesome.

TIME TO GET BUSY! I'm already buried in a pile of things to do.

People disappoint.

Inevitable.

Flight's at 4

Well right after I went back to sleep (see aforementioned nightmare), I had this absolutely delish dream in which there was alot of lying around and not doing much. Languid, unproductive, taking long, starved drags of each other's scent. My dad had to wake me in the middle of that. Of course.

It's taking alot of willpower to not dial your number! Doesn't help that you feature in my early morning half-asleep hallucinations. I haven't talked to you since.. Weeks ago? Hmm this kinda sucks. Whatever I'll call you when I get back. You just busy yourself with, well whatever post-exam stuff you have planned. I'm thinking of you, is all. I hope you're okay where you are. I wish you love :)

Oh fucking hell I don't know why I'm blogging about this but shit I just had a scariest nightmare ever. Fuck fuckity fuck my heart is racing damn hard. Weird, how my first instinct was to grab my touch to type this out. Well, not that I feel better. Shit! What a rush. That was frikkin real.

The Scorpion is one intense little creature, with enough poison in its own tail to disable or kill a much larger opponent. But the problem with this kind of built-in biological weaponry is that it must be mastered in order to be used most effectively. You Scorpios can use your “stinger” for self-defense, using your powerful emotional awareness to render your opponent harmless. But there is a sexual component of poisonous tail also, and until Scorpio learns to control those strong urges, Scorpio may find yourself in uncomfortable situations.

Scorpio is the only sign that has three animal totems. First, there is the well-known Scorpion with its active tail. Second, as the Scorpio learns to master its passion and hold its instincts at bay, it changes into the Eagle. The Eagle has more perspective, for it flies high above the surface of circumstances, swooping down with its power only to kill prey for food. In its third form, the Scorpion becomes the always-peaceful dove. The real meaning of Scorpio is thus shown. Scorpio is about metamorphosis. Scorpios transform the painful poisons of possessive passion into a higher consciousness based on universal love.

The Scorpio motto might be “What is hidden is more interesting than what is obvious.” You are the detectives of the zodiac. Your magnetic personality draws others to you. But you can also be secretive yourself, for you learn early on that when you express everything, others may be scared by the power of your feelings. You desperately want to have someone to merge with your feelings, but can become cold and withdrawn when hurt in love. You have the magic to light up the dark, but sometimes you would benefit by looking at the positive side of things rather than going into the darkness at all.