Oh, insecurities.

Sometimes I just sit in stillness and marvel at how ridiculously lucky I am that I have you.

And then I marvel at how ridiculous I am for thinking that, because luck had nothing to do with it.

I was always meant to walk up to you that afternoon, take fate by the shoulders, and push it in the direction towards where we are today.

When will the chips come down?

I mean, what's the worse that could happen? What am I afraid of? Is change silent destructive, or nothing more than a sudden loud noise?

I can see you stalking like a predator.

Last night was really interesting. I sat next to an American guy who appreciated my "sharpness" while I returned the good intentions by keeping track of his curse-count and making digs at his choice of women. Engineers. The seafood was orgasmic though (Y)


Okay out of bed. Off to a day of spamming floorball and quality time with my baby.

Life is good :) (on weekends)

Me and Bobby McGee

But still. I swim in warm liquid happiness. For every moment I am grateful.

My soul may need saving,

Anxiety/Fear/Nausea/Worry/Dread/Obsession

pick, choose, permutate

Funny,

the lengths at which you'll go to get in my pants. I may have flitted from flower to flower once, indecisive and cavelier. But respect my choices, respect unwritten boundaries, respect yourself, and back the fuck off.

If not for the American spelling, totally :)

This.

haha :)

Instead, he made me cry.

Intense dreams leave me shaken for the whole day. And when night falls, I don't want to sink into sleep.

glee. says (8:43 PM):
yooo
Therese Indefatigible says (8:44 PM):
suppp
glee. says (8:44 PM):
haha 2 weeks to results!
Therese Indefatigible says (8:44 PM):
shuttup go away

Pour yourself on me.

Or maybe, it's just that when you're not around, the colours slowly drain out. All that's left is a cold metal sink. Impatient, empty, silent.

Just a theory.

I don't even.

I just realised I have uncomplete sentences in both my posts this morning. Oh well. I had a really nice day today :) Although the words still stuck in my throat and I'm not ready to well, be all out there. Weird how my brain is wired, I let go of the most absurd things but withhold the simplest. When will I un-strange?

Looking away.

You think you're done with them, but the next moment your insecurities come knocking like an old friend, fucking up whatever healing you thought you'd accomplished.

What should I do with my mediocre talent? There's so much awesome averageness inside of me waiting to

Sunday morning.

Dearest kids of the interweb,

I wish we ran in different circles.

Then I wouldn't be so ridiculously amazed at how loathesome you are.

First, breakfast. Because, y'know, we'll be hungry.

And then we'll spend long languid hours being enveloped in the world, in each other.

The words would never show the you I've come to know.

And one by one the stars would all go out

Then you and I

Would simply fly

Away.

Hold on to whatever you find, baby.

Who do you love?
Me or the thought of me?

Hold on to whatever will get you through.

Weak spots.

What hurts the most?

My quiet 18th birthday last year. Straight hair, straightforward. But things go in circles, and once you start you can't stop.

Midnight streetlight, pressure overdrive.

I'm being a grouch cause I'm missing jb and there's no way to contact him.


I'm gonna go eat my chocolate cake now.

That is all.

Good god!

Black & Gold

I'm not indecisive. I'm just waiting for the right moment. My mind's already made up, even if I pretend it isn't. I'm just waiting for the right moment.

Just swallow.

Hmm. Okay.

Melly & I

Menstrual Cramps.

Just one of those things. I don't even feel like counting my ang pao loot.

I think I'll name my first daughter Collie.

On a random note, did you know that names like Shirley, Beverly, Kim, and Ashley all orginated as boy names?

Nobody puts baby in a corner.

(end picture spam)

Oh.

substance

Have a little faith.

The shit has hit the fan.

Sleeping my troubles away.

If you won't, I won't either.
Cowardice, or fear.
Whichever you prefer.
I'm all of it, none of it,
Failing when the fight's near.

Emily Elbert - Let's Stay Together (Al Green cover)

dangggggggggg.

good or bad, happy or sad :)

Love came easy in our parents' time.

Straining under the weight of our expectations.

But it's okay. We just need to step back and gives ourselves some room to breathe. No stress, no worries.

Just when you thought it was safe to turn the lights out.

Today I found out that JB does an 8ish minute 2.4km, a set of 23 for pull-ups, and a 2.9m standing broad jump for napfa.


I am deeply unsettled. And undeniably turned on.

Quiet Dog by Mos Def

simmer down, simmer down, simmer down

I love chatting with Raksha.

Plaintive yet congenial.

But this time it's different.

I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else, but you.

It's a new day!

Though the week's almost over.
There's a beauty in the return of light,
after each hollow night.

Chinese New year is almost upon us. What you gotta say bout that?

So I gave you a story to tell.

"I’ve made mistakes in my life. I’ve let people take advantage of me, and I accepted way less than I deserve. But, I’ve learned from my bad choices and even though there are some things I can never get back and people who will never be sorry, I’ll know better next time and I won’t settle for anything less than I deserve."

Love comes when the manipulation stops.

What should bother you the most, is someone walking into your life knowing they won't stay.

The planet's talking bout a revolution.

I keep thInking the worst when I haven't even tried. I'll never be the one.

A firecracker on my table top.

What do you think of when you look at me, if you look at me at all. I know it makes you uncomfortable somewhere in your weak areas, that I'm not what you thought I was. And what would you say to me, if you spoke to me at all. The words you imagined yourself using would somehow stick in your throat, and you'd choke. Choke from all your shallow judgements, unecessary opinions, battles not yours to fight. It will kill you, if it kills at all.

If it doesn't, well, my hands won't be dirtied by you. If they can be dirtied at all.

--------------------------------------------

I'm just a menace misinterpreted, only human. I'm only human. I'm over-thinking thoughts but I'm only human, made of flesh, made of sand, made of human.

The most important thing not withstanding,

bad jokes are forever :)

So I haven't been posting much. Let's do a small recap. Saturday I went back to VJ for training with JB as usual, then I went cycling with the girls.. Which I'm still recovering from. I don't think I'll survive nightcycling with the classmates even if I went. This butt is just not built for bike sadles. Mmm sunday I met Boon Yew to catch up, then I watched Avatar AGAIN, because the mum insisted. Someone should come up with a line of clothing inspired by the navi. I would totally jump on that bandwagon. Hey, just a thought. I mean, Naturi's wardrobe changes were really something.

Anyway happy birthday kev :):)

WITHOUT ME, YOU'RE JUST AWESO

why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?